Wednesday, May 5, 2010

Karen's Doing What?

With graduation near, I decided to post this short story just for fun. You won't find any profound spiritual insights, but perhaps you'll get a laugh, and that's good medicine according to scripture. I hope you enjoy it.

“Hey, Karen. So what are you going to do now that you’ve graduated?” John asked, fully donned in cap and gown.

“Well, I really want to get into clothing design. I was thinking of applying for a position at Columbia Sportswear.”

“Oh, that’s cool. I’m going to be the next American Idol.” John raised his chin and struck a pose as if anticipating a wave of cheers. “I’m driving up to Jersey for auditions next month.”

Karen raised her eyebrows and with a quirky grin replied, “Good luck with that.”

“No luck needed,” John said as he caught a glimpse of Steve out the corner of his eye. “Hey, I gotta talk to Steve. See ya later, Karen.”

John rushed toward his partner in classroom crimes. “Steve, we did it man.” The clap of their high five faded into the roar of conversation around them.

“Hey, was that Karen you were talking to?” Steve asked. “What’s she going to be doing now?”

“Get this. She’s going to be designing sports jerseys in… Oh where was it? Columbia. That’s right. Columbia.”

“No way. I never expected her to move so far away.”

* * *

“Thanks for coming to my open house, Emily,” Steve said as he gave Emily a hug.

“So where are you going to college?” Emily inquired.

“I’m going out to Denver, but that’s nothing like where Karen’s going.”

“Really. Where’s she heading to?”

“John told me she’s going to Columbia, South America.”

“What’s she doing there?”

“Oh, it was something with sports uniforms. I don’t remember. Maybe she’s laundering for a soccer team or something. Must be good money.”

* * *

“Cindy, guess what I heard about Karen.” Emily sat cross-legged on her bed with the phone sealed to her ear.

“What? Tell me.”

“Steve said that she’s laundering money for a team in South America. I bet they’re a drug ring.”
“You can’t be serious,” Cindy exclaimed. “Karen selling drugs in South America?” Cindy’s little sister, Abby, was passing by Cindy’s door at that moment and ventured out to the living room. Her father reclined in his plush, burgundy chair with the daily paper in front of him.

“Abby,” he asked, “what’s your sister all worked up about?”

“She said that Karen’s going to be selling drugs down south.”

“Oh, her dad must have got her a position with his pharmaceutical company in Texas. She’ll probably end up marrying some cowboy down there.”

* * *

Abby put on a rhinestone necklace to complement the silver glittered purse by her side and promenaded around Hannah’s bedroom. The two girls giggled as they mimicked their perception of womanhood. Hannah’s older brother, Ryan, peaked his head in the door and interrupted their play.

“Hey, Abby. What’s your sister doing this fall?”

“She doesn’t know yet,” Abby said. “But I know Karen’s going to a pharm…a pharm…a pharm something down in Texas. She’s going to marry a cowboy.”

“Really? Karen working on a ranch!”

Ryan headed downtown to meet some friends at the mall. He pulled open the over sized glass door and Susan came bounding out with an armful of packages.

“You need some help, Sue.”

“No thanks, I got it. So what are you up to, Ryan?”

“Nothing much really, but did you hear what Karen’s doing?”

“No, what?”

Ryan placed his thumbs in his front jeans pockets, bowed his legs, and said in a southern drawl, “She’s going to be brandin’ cow hides in the Lone Star state.”


“That’s what I heard,” Ryan said and then galloped off into the mall.

Susan, meanwhile, meandered toward her vehicle in the parking lot while perusing the seventy percent off wardrobe she acquired. In the midst of her retail reveling, she nearly knocked over her home economics teacher.

“Excuse me, I’m so sorry– Mrs. Murphy. It’s you. Are you O.K.?”

“I’m fine, Susan. I’m fine. How’s the summer going?”

“Great. Sure glad to be done with school.”

“What are your plans for the fall?”

“Well, I’m taking some classes here at West Tech. But– you know Karen, right?”


“I just heard that she plans on designing a brand of leather clothes in some ‘star’ state. Probably California.”

* * *

Karen answered the phone, “Hello, this is Karen.”

“Hi, Karen. This is Mrs. Murphy.”

“Hi, Mrs. Murphy.”

“I heard you want to get into clothing design on the west coast. You should apply at Columbia Sportswear. I have a friend who works there.”

“That’s exactly what I was planning on doing.”

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