Values to live by

Values. You’ve heard the term. Maybe you’ve written some down. Maybe you’ve helped craft some for an organization. But do you own yours? It’s not an issue if you have values, we all do (good and bad), but do you know your values and own them? 

One of the most helpful exercises I’ve found to help narrow down what’s truly important to me is found in Stephen Covey’s book “7 habits of highly effective people.” He instructs you to picture your own funeral and visualize what you would want people to say about you. You’ve heard tributes given at funerals about the deceased, “He was so optimistic,” “She was such a caring person,” “He could make anyone laugh,” etc. Now if you were the one lying in the coffin and your time on this earth was done, what would you want people to say? Perhaps the more probing question is “What would they say?” Pause and think about that for a moment. 

The answers to those two questions will tell you whether your ideal values match your real values. And the values we live by are guardrails keeping us on course (right or wrong). What values are you living by? Our actual values direct our choices and actions. If I value honesty more than money, I’ll point out the mistake the cashier made in my favor and give back the overage. If I value diligence more than comfort, I’ll finish that house project rather than binge watch the latest NETFLIX series. Our values direct our choices and actions. 

As believers, our values need to reflect the truth of God’s word. Mining values from scripture requires little effort. Many gems glisten on the surface waiting to be taken. Romans 12 serves as just such a site to start collecting. Over the weeks to come, we will examine some of the values extolled by the apostle Paul in verses 9-13, but we begin with the value of love. 

Love is the hallmark of the Christian faith. “God is love” we are told. Love stands supreme within the triad of virtues. Yet, trying to grasp the concept of love today for many is like trying to juggle slime. Paul doesn’t leave love as some nebulous concept open to worldly definitions. The value Paul calls believers to embrace is genuine love that expresses itself in distinct action. Pseudo-love abounds in our culture. That love which masquerades as care and commitment but secretly serves its own interests. And when its own interests aren’t met, it packs its bags and slams the door behind it. Paul extols the pursuit of GENUINE love. An unhypocritical love that does not seek its own interests but the interest of others. Paul explains it further in I Corinthians 13:4-5, “Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful...” Love is not out to serve itself but others. That’s genuine love. 

Paul further depicts love in Romans 12 as the kind of committed love found in a family, “love one another with brotherly affection.” Genuine love cares for a person like a parent would a child or one sibling for another sibling. In the family of God, we literally are family, adopted by grace through faith in Jesus Christ. We can demonstrate that love through commitment and caring. Obviously, one person could never care for everyone’s needs, nor should we. But we can show Christ’s loving care to someone.  

Genuine love also honor others as shown at the end of verse 10. The ESV give a competitive spin on Paul’s words, “Outdo one another in showing honor.” If you’re going to have a competition, see who can honor the other person more. Genuine love values or honors others. Such love demonstrates the mind of Christ as Paul explains in Philippians 2:2-5, “complete my joy by being of the same mind, having the same love, being in full accord and of one mind. Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others. 5Have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus.” 

Genuine love sees another person as an image bearer of God, as loved by God, as people created by God for a purpose and who bring something worthwhile to the table. Do you and I approach others in that fashion? Do we value people enough to listen and learn from them? Do we value people enough to serve them? Do we value them enough to encourage rather than critique them?  

I don’t always fall on the affirmative side of those questions. This is an area where I’m learning and leaning on Christ to help me grow. He came as that suffering servant, laying aside the glories of Heaven to become a human being and serve us to the point of death on a cross. To serve me, a sinful man unworthy of such love. Yet, Christ loved me anyway.  

Our human nature gravitates toward levels. We elevate some people and put down others. Even our games encourage us to level up and get more perks and gear and skills. And we feel empowered when we do, looking down on those lower leveled players who aren’t as advanced we are. Of course, this plays out beyond the world of gaming into life itself. Whether we level up in education, finances, talents, fitness, etc., we often look down on those not so leveled up and place ourselves on a higher tier. We don’t value them as much because they aren’t at our level.  

How contrary that is to what Jesus did. Jesus leveled down—way down. He not only left heaven and became a human being, but he became a servant of human beings. He washed our filthy feet and then our filthy, sin-stained hearts by dying on a shameful cross. Jesus leveled down. And as he walked on that lower level, He valued the Samaritan woman at the well, the leper outside the city, the woman caught in adultery. He values you. He values me. 

Genuine love does that. It values people as image bearers, created and loved by God. People who have something to offer. Genuine love approaches every person as someone you can learn from. It doesn’t mean some people won’t advance further than others in education, finances, talents, fitness, or whatever. Even in Jesus’ parable some seed produced 30-fold and other seed produced 100-fold. Different people will excel in different ways, but genuine love means we don’t walk on a tier above anyone. We walk on that lower level with Jesus and honor others. That’s genuine love. 

Value one from Romans 12:9-12—GENUINE LOVE.   

Next week we’ll look at the value of HOLY GOODNESS.